Why??

Well i juz read J's blog.. i duno y.. i seemed 2 hav realized sumtin bt i still dino wat exactly wat it is.. Tears juz seem 2 b flowing down my cheeks.. PMR is like da day afta tomorrow... Comming 2 tink of it.. y the hech am i cryin?? Well i do feel lonely.. HECK i do.. IS TER SUMTIN WRONG WIT ME?? well wat dont i have?? hav an awsome family.. awsome frenz... ppl hu care a lot 4 me.. bt ters still sumthing missing... I duno wat bt ter is sumtin missining frm my life... Its like i lost something dat was so precious 2 me.. is it juz me or does every1 hav 2 hav dat special sum1 in their life?? am i missing dat?? am i envious?? am i scared?? am i nervous?? am i a rebel?? did i hurt sum1 datz special 2 me?? did i do something wrong?? or is it cuz i put on loads of weight?? watz becomin of me?? im startin 2 b anti social.. dressin in black.. keepin quite... a part of me is asking wat happened 2 dat cheerful lil gal?? wer has she gone 2?? why is she do depressed?? she has almost eveything ppl want.. She has everthing she needs..but she cant stop crying.. everynight she cries.. but why??